Picture this: you open the gift wishlist from a young person in your life. As your eyes travel over the pages, your pulse speeds up and you feel your chest tighten…
Sound familiar?
But here’s the thing that could make all the difference, it’s up to you how much you buy from that list. In fact, the best gift you might give this year, to yourself and your loved ones, is a healthy money mindset.
First things first, what is a money mindset, and how can we get, or give, one?
“A money mindset is the attitude, emotions and beliefs we hold about money, and what money means to us. This mindset begins to take shape when we’re very young, often in response to how the adults in our lives talk, or don’t talk, about money,” Leon Ward, CEO of Money Ready, explains. “We pick up beliefs from what we observe – whether money is a source of secrecy, stress or pride. The factor that impacts us as we grow up is whether we’re aware of this money mindset or not, and whether we have control over it or, alternatively, it controls us.”
Showing your love
Simonne Gnessen, money coach and founder of Wise Monkey Financial Coaching, warns that, just as we start to develop a money mindset early, how we link love and spending is often rooted in childhood. “If love was shown through giving gifts, it’s easy to grow up thinking that’s what love looks like. Those patterns can stay with us long into adulthood,” she says.
However, gift giving is just one way to show our affection. “You can show love through kind acts, such as picking up festive groceries for a neighbour who can’t get out easily or making a homemade gift for someone,” says Leon. “It could equally be about enjoying time together by going for a walk to see the Christmas lights, decorating the tree as a family, or making hot chocolate and watching a festive film. The point is, we signal love in lots more ways than by spending money.”
It can be difficult to remember there are other choices when we’re bombarded with adverts urging us to buy more and more gifts. “We’re fed constant messages from retailers about what makes a good festive season,” says Leon. “These message tap into our insecurities, making us worry about whether what we’ve bought is enough, compare ourselves to others and urging us to buy, buy, buy. But sometimes the best gift is being fully present.”
What would you do differently?
As a money coach, Simonne often has clients who struggle with guilt around this time of year. “People tell me, ‘I don’t want my kids to have a bad Christmas just because I’m bad with money.’ It quickly becomes about people-pleasing and panic buying rather than genuine joy.”
The best thing we can do at this point is reframe the question. “In the run up to the festive period, we’re often on autopilot. Ask yourself, what would you do differently if it was just about what you wanted, rather than what others expect? What would make you and your loved ones happy?”
It’s possible to find your own way of making things special. “To make big changes to ingrained traditions, you need time to plan and manage expectations, so start that now for Christmas 2026!” Simonne recommends. “For instance, if you have a big family or group of friends, why not suggest a Secret Santa, and get just one exceptional gift instead of 15? Challenge those deeply rooted customs and ask yourself whether they’re working for you.”
Become a festive rebel!
Shockingly, the average Brit gets into £439 of debt because of festive spending (Must-Know Christmas Statistics for UK Shoppers). Credit card spending increased by 14.5% to £21.9 billion in December 2024 (47 Christmas Statistics and Facts for 2025).
Financial education can help enormously, not least in helping you to make the choices that work for you by knowing your options and planning ahead. Understanding APR, or Annual Percentage Rate, is also helpful. This type of interest means that when you spend using a credit card, or Buy Now Pay Later, you can end up owing far more than you borrow.
To take control of our money mindset and the impulse to spend too much, Simonne encourages us to be braver. “Don’t just go with the flow because it’s simpler. We might be saving up or struggling financially, and as well as all the gift-buying, there’s pressure to go out for expensive social events. It takes courage to suggest doing things differently, but it can actually be freeing. And very often, when one person finally speaks up, everyone is relieved.”
Changes to consider now
To take control right now, Leon recommends hitting pause and taking a deep breath. “We need to challenge the mindset of more being better. Even this close to the big day, there are small changes that can make it meaningful and, potentially, less expensive. If you’re hosting lots of people, why not ask for some contributions, for instance, a dessert or crackers? If guests want to and have time to make the crackers, even better!”
Asking younger visitors to help out shows little ones their efforts count too. “A niece or nephew could make name cards for each place setting – and I bet those name cards will get used year after year.”
You could even set a rule about at least some gifts having been pre-loved. “There are plenty of websites and charity shops where money goes further if you opt for second-hand,” Leon suggests. “This might also prompt you to be extra creative and thoughtful.”
Leon has one more comment on why we should consider moving away from the festive spending treadmill and doing things differently. “By doing this, we role model a healthy money mindset with potential for long-term benefits well beyond the festive season, both for ourselves and those around us.”
For more tips this festive season, follow Money Ready’s ‘Stop the Snowball’ campaign on our social media feeds.
Did you know you can give money to charity when you do your festive shopping, or any other shopping, online? You can sign up here to donate to Money ready, and it won’t cost you a penny.
Just follow the instructions on screen to donate to Money Ready when spending at the stores you use. It’s a great way to feel saintly for indulging yourself, and others.
